Jun
Salsa & the Devil Peppers
So…I am at the Farmer’s Market this am. In the rain. I am gathering supplies to make some salsa. Tomatoes, onion, fresh garlic, red and yellow peppers. I have one particular stand where I am a regular. There is normally a guy there that is superbly nice to me. Today, it is his nice lady cousin – not my farm boy boyfriend.
The following convo ensues with Satan woman/the nice lady cousin:
“what chu makey?”
“Salsa.”
To which she cocks her eyebrow. Yes woman, the gringo is making salsa. She smiles and says “Chu need deese.” Points to the peppers that you see above. She then launches into HER version of how to make salsa. I listen intently. She tells me to take just a few of the tiny peppers and add them to my batch. “Por flavor” she says.
I head home and get to chopping and mixing. I save the adorable peppers for the last ingredient so I can accurately taste test. I don’t want this too spicy to enjoy.
As I am chopping the first of the cute little peppers…my eyes begin to water. Not the nice tearing that I get when I chop onions. No. They are running down my face. WITH snot pouring out of my nose. I have at this point chopped ONE. The next one, I decide to do under running water to try to help. Yeah. That didn’t work. My fingers were now on fire and I started having trouble breathing.
I tossed down the Devil Peppers and ran out of the kitchen. Straight into my 13 YO’s room. He would at least know how to dial 911 if I needed them. It took me a good 3 minutes to be able to breathe properly again. Mind you…I. HAVE. NOT. CONSUMED. ANY. PEPPERS.
I washed my hands to try to get the burning to stop. But not before I scratched my eyelid and then my ear and then tried to cover my mouth with my hand so that I could get a breath without the peppers. So…my face is on fire in various places. My eyes are watering. I have snot pouring out of my nose and I am gasping for breath. I am also thinking that there is no way in hell that I am putting these Devil Peppers into my salsa. Nope.
These things are about 2 inches in length. They are a various, pretty red, orange and green. Now, can someone please tell me exactly what kind of peppers they are? I will be calling them Devil Peppers until I get their proper name. I also think I am going to have a hard time trusting anyone named Carmen ever again.
PS – Salsa is fantastic !!!
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I am living proof that 30 something, eco-friendly, vegetarians are not tight assed boring people. I bitch, I curse, I rant and I rave. I do not live conventionally nor do I think inside any box
that you may know of. I am a mom, a wife, a gamer, a blogger and a woman who loves to have fun. This blog is just me, blunt, raw and to the point. 
Take it from someone who’s had her own share of tragic hot pepper salsa making trauma… be very careful about what you’re touching when you’re going the potty. One slip o’ the finger and you’ll be in BIGGER trouble than just a snotty nose and watering eyes.
LMAO. I actually realized my eyelid was burning WHILE I was peeing. I sat there wondering what in the hell I should do.
And yet, strangely enough, there’s no photographic evidence available to us…
Hope your weekend goes better than this!
LOL! Well if you ever needed spice in the bedroom, you know what to buy! I haven’t the slightest what they are, but have fun eating them if you dare.